Saturday, February 22, 2014

Yea Sigh

"Yea Sigh," she said as we walked through the door home from our travels.  She threw her arms around my waist and continued, "being home is a yea (toothy grin) and a sigh (heavy, exaggerated exhale). Do you know what I'm saying Mom?  Do you?"

Yes, I know what you're saying Bit.  I know it perfectly and exactly with every fabric of my being.  Bittersweet is a fact of most of life and a constant in my every day.  It is a plant, a taste and a feeling. Truthfully, it's a feeling I have more than any other.  I aim to be. here. now, but it's a constant struggle to stay in this moment without looking back longingly.  Without missing or pining.  Without languishing or lamenting.   It's simply the way we're wired.

I too felt melancholy that our family vacation was coming to an end, but I also felt peace wash over me in warm waves the closer we got to home.  There are stresses that come with traveling that children are immune to, and comforts of home that children have not yet grown to appreciate.  I missed my cats, my bed even though it is a queen and not a king, and my quiet life.  I am grateful for any opportunity to meet new people and places and experiences, but at the end of the day, weekend or week, I am happy to come home.  And I wouldn't want it any other way.