Weekending

This weekend was two late nights and two rather lazy days. It's what happens when we stay up past our bedtimes. It's what happens when we end the night with chocolate martinis. It's what happens in February. I find this second month of the year to be the most insular. It's raining right now. Freezing rain. I have no plan to leave the house all day. So yes, confined and also content with that reality.

Friday was pizza and Sequence with my brother and sil and Saturday was Mexican and cards with Pete and Sue. Shanghai Rummy is a new favorite. These are the best kinds of nights: cozy, chummy, filled with easy conversation. They are the kind of copacetic collusions that make time elusive because before you know it, it's the next day. 

The next day and I sleep in and fill my days with this and that. Nothing pressing. A nap after errands and cleaning Saturday. Time with my books and in my kitchen on Sunday. A pot of black beans simmering away on the stove all afternoon. Sunday was Mexican at Casa Wags again. We three sat down for family dinner. It's something I have missed with Lily's crazy schedule. She declared that we could only speak Spanish for the duration of the meal and we had pretty great conversation. She's thinking about a minor in Spanish and I think that is a smart call.

I came here thinking I wanted to wax poetic on getting old. I had thoughts on bedtimes and card nights and the passage of winter into spring, but I'm at a loss of expression right now. All I know is that as nasty as it is outside, the sparrows and chickadees are singing their spring songs like they know something I do not. I'm in the middle of another season in the middle of my life and there's no place I'd rather be. 

 Today's co-workers.

Grateful Friday

 Today I give thanks for...

Teddy coming home for an impromptu visit last week. The kittens were thankful for his presence too.

Licky pop treats. It's their favorite.

This Valentine's Day bouquet. I am in the camp that believes Valentines is a bit of a Hallmark holiday and yet, I still indulge my loved ones because I think mid-February is the perfect time to give little treats and tokens. They indulge me too.

Lils loves making Rice Krispies Treats. They taste even better when heart shaped and made by her.

Besties.

A new cashmere sweater. A valentine to myself.

 

And Ann Patchett's book of essays called These Precious days.

Gus, my constant kitchen companion. Here he is very interested in my tuna casseroles. It's a good thing he's so scrumptious himself.

New recipes. This casserole was Damaris Phillips' recipe. She beat Bobby Flay with it and it is a winner. I loved the campanelle pasta, the Gruyere, the potato chips on top. The recipient's also agreed.

The cats licked these cans of tuna clean. Gus would have kept at it all day long if I had let him. He may have eaten the can.

Hazel my absolute honey. I know I say this often, but she truly is the sweetest little lady and we are all totally smitten with her.

What holiday lunch looks like when you are two Jews and a gentile. We had Katz Deli delivered last week and it was a treat. The sour dill pickles were the best. We can't get those around here.

Sunday stock. Everything, but the kitchen sink.

Last night's almost full moon. I was a little cranky when I saw I had to hall the rest of the trash to the curb for pick up today, but then I saw that beaming celestial beaut and I was grateful for the chance to look up. No picture. They never translate.

I spent last night watching Scenes From a Marriage. I was so drawn in by the authenticity and vulnerability of the story, the acting that I watched all 5 episodes with Gus sound asleep on my lap. It was remarkable how the house was like another character. Today I'm thinking about what makes a house a home and eager to watch the 1973 original by Ingmar Bergman.

One more month until these three turn one. Yes, there will be presents.

I Said No to Maui

It's true. My aunt invited me to be her plus one on a 5 day trip to Maui in 2 weeks, and I regretfully declined. I said no to time with one of my favorite people in a bucket list place. Oh, an almost all expense paid trip. I know blasphemy. What's wrong with me?

Covid.

Yep, I'm blaming Covid for making me a wuss who is unable to embrace spontaneity and adventure.

When I received the invitation Saturday night, I was so excited and sure that I would go. Then I didn't sleep well that night and I had nagging anxiety all day Sunday. It is so soon, so far, so out of my current comfort zone. 

I regret that I couldn't get over my little insecurities for this big trip. I've been googling what to do in Maui and checking the weather. And while I know I'm missing out, I also know it's the right thing for me right now. It is 100 percent possible to have regret and relief at the same time. 

My aunt was an absolute gem about my decision. I didn't have to elaborate on my reasons. She shared them with me. She knows me well.

The picture above was taken 30 years ago in my mom's kitchen. Gidget and Moondoggie had just returned from 2 weeks in Hawaii sun kissed and Sun In soaked. Do they still make that awful stuff? Mike found this snapshot last week when we were going through what I call our memory boxes also known as the shit your parents finally say they won't store for you anymore. I was so adventurous back then that I slept in a tent with a stray cat on the beach and woke up to the tide coming into our camp. I swam in surf so out of my league that I had to be rescued by the life guard. We swam out on the back side of a reef  at Hanauma Bay to snorkel and a storm blew in. The current got tricky. It was hard to get back to shore. I wasn't freaked out. I was energized. We trekked out to the Toilet Bowl where it literally felt like you would be flushed out into the Pacific Ocean. It was wonderful.

So I figured the timing of this picture resurfacing had to be some kind of sign. 

But Mike found many other pictures from our early days together and to single out just the vacation pictures is not valid. I so often look to the universe for answers I already have. 

It's Wednesday

It's 50 degrees today. A big storm is predicted to just miss us again tomorrow. This has been a winter of near misses. Most are celebrating, but not me. I think that's a point I've made rather clear here. Now I'm just hoping the rain holds off long enough to get in a walk after work. I downloaded The Tender Bar because it was due back at the library. It was mine for three weeks, and while I got right into it, I picked up something else and then found myself in a reading rut. I'm hoping this motivates me to get back into the walking groove too. My sore knee is finally not sore. I'm far behind on reading and fitness goals. Hopefully this helps.

Ted was able to hitch a ride home for the weekend. That kept me busy in the kitchen. No complaints. We also had Soup or Bowl party on Sunday. It was actually the soup trifecta of a weekend here. Mike made a steak with veggies and farro that was delish. I made my ramen. It was spicy. I also made another batch of chicken dumpling for Ted to take back and to deliver to a neighbor who just had surgery. That was a pot of comfort. When I tell you what I did to the base, you'll understand why. I made the stock last week and then over the weekend I made stock out of the stock. That means I put in all the herbs and veggies and chicken again and let it simmer for hours before straining it. It was a beautiful rich amber color and it was full of flavor. I would have enjoyed a bowl of the stock on it's own. There was also granola, peasant and banana breads, and a batch of my new favorite cookies: think Tollhouse with copious amounts of dark chocolate and peanut butter chips and a huge scoop of oats. I brought them to work Monday and they were gone. The chocolate covered strawberries and the Bundtinis that were delivered were untouched, and those little cakes are pretty fabulous.

We went out for a family dinner Friday when Lils got home from work. She's been putting in a lot of hours and working out after her shifts so we barely see her. Ted's choice was Water Street Brewery and while it's not my favorite, I'm good if I'm with them. Also, it wins on atmosphere. I need to go on a little rant here about eating out these days. It's been disappointing. I'm not aggravated by a long wait or a more select menu. I am dissatisfied with rude, dismissive service and bad food all while prices have soared. I know I know...Covid. Yet I'm wondering when we will ever stop using this as a universal excuse for everything. For now, I will continue to cook at home more and frequent the restaurants I know are worth my money when we decide to go out. To be transparent, our service Friday was perfect...the food was meh and the bill was silly.

While Ted was home, we drank wine together, he worked out with his dad and his sister and we all watched some football and a little Ted Lasso. The later was more entertaining. He also wore the kittens out. It was a good, quick visit that ended with some extended family drama. Drama I don't have the energy to go into here...now...ever. What's heartbreaking fails to translate.

Valentine's Eve was low key. Lily worked and then went for a swim. Mike and I played cards and made a nice lobster dinner...chicken breast for her. The cats ate my roses. I planned to make risotto, but wasn't in the mood for fuss. I remembered the oven risotto phenomenon and went that easy route. I tell you, there is no difference. Mike is now the lobster king. These were the best tails ever. See, who needs restaurants?

I had to think hard what day today is. I was at a loss over whether in was Tuesday or Wednesday. My heart is a little heavy, I've been sleeping like a rock and dreaming in novels. It's been hard getting out of bed and so easy to crawl back in. Many would say that this is February malaise, but I know better. And I also know the kind of self-care that nips this low level depression in the bud.

 

 

Grateful Friday

Today I give thanks for...

An early morning. Before work, I had a good workout, I watered my plants and I put the makings for Buffalo Chicken in the crock pot.

Last night I finished The Stranger in the Lifeboat. I want to talk to someone about this thought provoking little story. I liked it, but more for it's entertainment value than its spiritual impact.

 Now The Tender Bar has my full attention and it rather deserves it.

My new obsession...Wordle.

A congratulatory bouquet from Grandma and Grandma for our new Badger.

 Kitchen inspiration.

 

Kitten entertainment. I'll only be able to call them that for another month.

 

 

This week's show: The Shrink Next Door. I am a big fan of both Will Farrell and Paul Rudd. These are not their usual roles.

It was a good week. Things were in balance and that brings a welcome sense of peace.

Life is Good

I looked out the window this morning and the drab landscape made me envious of the storm that's just missing us. We have not had much snow and while that may be too much, I'd like a good blizzard. The other day it was near 50 degrees. I went for a walk after work and the air smelled of almost spring. And it was light until I turned into my driveway at 5 o'clock. It's 12 degrees today. I believe we'll have at least six more weeks of winter, and I'm okay with it too.

Last night I turned the stock I made over the weekend into soup...Chicken Soup with Dumplings. I've never made dumplings before, but I will make them again. I have many iterations of chicken soup. This is my new favorite. I added parsnips and dill, and those delicate little dumplings. I wanted to send some home with Candace who was over for our weekly happy hour, but it wasn't ready. I gave her the Mushroom Lover's Pasta I made the night before instead. The key to that dish is authentic Italian Papardelle, fresh Parm, and a few glugs of good Balsamic and crisp white wine. I'm having so much fun now that Lils is a mushroom lover.

Speaking of Lils...Friday she got the exciting, much anticipated news that she will continue the Wisconsin family tradition. This fall she will become a Badger! My brother and sil were over when she got the news and we all celebrated her acceptance loudly. We Facetimed T Bone knowing he'd want to be among the first to congratulate her.

It's funny because I almost wasn't a Badger. My mom filled out the application for me without my knowledge. I thought I wanted to go to a smaller school further away. My mom knew me well. I needed to be closer to home and I never felt overwhelmed by the size. I quickly found my place and my people. The rest is history.

I met Mike my first day on campus. He greeted us as we exited the elevator onto Frisby Floor. It was his job as a sophomore. In the three years that followed, we went on several double dates with our significant others and crossed paths at some of the same house parties. It wasn't until my senior year that we felt a spark. We were at one of those house parties with all the usual suspects and it could have gone another way as I had been involved with a couple of these guys. One could say there was some unfinished business. I left one of them on the driveway not believing what I was hearing after two years together and a year apart. I left the other at the bar not listening to what he was proposing because it was crazy. I went to the dance floor. The rest is history.

I'm excited for Lily's future and I know she's going to love being a Badger whatever that means for her.

We had a date to see Mean Girls on Sunday. Neither of us were particularly excited. I had no expectations having never seen the movie. The production was fun and engaging. We both laughed a lot and loved it and were happy we motivated for the show. Isn't that the truth? Sometimes the best times are the ones we resist.

This week I'm making it a priority to lean into positivity. It's actually written in my planner as a daily habit. I've found that smiling does make me happier and that speaking kindly to myself is a game changer.