Friday, August 28, 2020

Grateful Friday

Today I'm grateful for long lasting friendship and saying yes.

One week ago I was on an airplane bound for Phoenix. The reunion of my college crew was not a vacation, but a mission. One of us is in need. Saying no or not now was not an option. This is a little out of my comfort zone in that it was last minute, but definitely in my wheelhouse to be.here.now. When I tell you that this trip was life changing, I am not being dramatic. It touched me deeply on many levels and reminded me of the strength and beauty of  kindred connection. These were my peeps. These strong, accomplished, kind woman are still my peeps.

We converged on hot as Hades Arizona from Milwaukee, Chicago and Minneapolis...5 of us...to be there for ACH, the glue. Miles and years have separated us, but being together quickly felt familiar. I've always thought that the mark of true friendship is being able to pick up where you left off no matter the time elapsed and also the lack of awkwardness in the silent spaces. 

Well, there was no silence. No silence at all. We reminisced and laughed and cried. We caught up and made plans for the future. We left the house we rented only to get groceries and spent time lounging in the pool with the perfect view of Camelback Mountain despite the fact that it felt more like a hot tub. We never used the hot tub btw. We cooked together and stocked ACH's freezer with soups made with love. 

During dinner Saturday night, we went around the table sharing stories of signs from the other side. We've all lost parents, and we've all had experiences. I got chills several times. It may seem like a strange conversation to be having with someone facing her own mortality, but believe me when I tell you it's not. It was comforting and affirming. Every day we live we are one day closer to death. I say that not to be morbid, but to say live. This trip was the reminder I needed to live my one wild and precious life. 

My legacy will not be in what I did or accomplished, but rather in who I was. My shining triumphs are the relationships that I forged with the people in my life. Connection is my currency. Although, I wouldn't mind getting published one day.

On Sunday night, after we said good bye to ACH and took pictures under a perfect crescent moon (a Gamma Phi symbol), we sat around the table again all feeling very low and sad. I looked at the picture I'd seen all weekend and finally realized what it was. It was depicting a light at the end of the tunnel. I had this overwhelming whole body feeling that we were only saying goodbye for now. To my core, I just knew that ACH, the strongest, smartest, funniest of friends would quiet us all again with her stories and wise words. I'll continue to pray every night, that my vision, my instinct was real.


Then...

The 80s.


Traveling was seamless, not scary.

A special birthday surprise.

Home for the weekend.

The unicorn in the pool was another sign.

Wisconsin zen.

Now. 

Light at the end of the tunnel.

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