Last Day of the Year

I was lulled to sleep by the sound of the howling wind. Icy snow was covering the lawns and then the roads. I dreamt what felt like all night long. So vividly, borderline lucid. They felt more real than ethereal. That's not new for me, and yet I feel the need to share that my dreams lately have felt different.

My first stop this morning was the window to confirm what I already knew: the snow stuck. I knew because of the incandescent light a fresh snowfall exudes. I snuck out for a few hours of work. The roads were messy and mostly empty. Everyone is holed up at home. I will be too...soon.

For the first time in years, we are having a very quiet night at home on New Year's Eve. Just the two of us. We've gone back and forth over putting something together, but the truth is that I just am not feeling it this year. In years past, I've been known to throw something together post haste, but I don't anticipate any last minute soirees at Casa Wags tonight. We have a puzzle and a pizza. Netflix too. And a bottle of champs.

I'm going to try out my new instant pot tomorrow. The inaugural recipe will be lucky lentil soup. It often shows up on New Year's Day. We'll cheer on our Badgers in the Rose Bowl. We may or may not go to an open house, polar bear in Lake Michigan or get dressed at all. We will be looking forward to 2020.

I'm not big on resolutions. In the past, I've set intentions. This year I'm going with goals. Semantics? Yes and no. Intentions don't suggest active attainment and this year I am eager and excited to make some changes. Small at first. Attainable. The idea is to let them build on a foundation of success. Foundations as I have personal and professional goals. I won't write them down. Don't need to. They are written in my bones. A part of me. Essential. Always there.

I'm not ready to do a recap on 2019. I need more distance to see things clearly and impart my final words. Wisdom will long follow. Truth is, I may never get the clarity or certainty because I intend to look forward. Every year has it's gifts and losses, its joys and pains, its lessons and blessings. 2020 will be no different.