Happy Birthday Mom!

My first thought upon waking was not that I should be calling you first thing to wish you a happy 71st birthday. It was my second or third thought. That's progress. Or else it's the insulation of elapsed time. It's unfathomable that you've been gone for almost eleven years.

You're gone. You are not forgotten. I think of you most everyday. A song will come on or a hummingbird will visit my strepto carpella and I'll feel you near. Last weekend Mike and I sat in the yard after dark and we heard owls calling. That's rare in these parts. We toasted you. Teddy gathered up a handful of heart shaped rocks while we were at Webb Lake, a place you've never been and yet a place I very much feel you, and he gave them to me. He knows how much I love them. Your legacy lives on.

Some people don't understand the signs and signals I speak of. I am open about my feelings and beliefs with regard to the gossamer thin veil between life and death...between you and me. It's the only way I'm upright and moving forward.

I just sent my brother and husband off for a visit to Madison. It's a beautiful almost fall day...a perfect football Saturday. The Badgers play Michigan today. Two top 15 Big Ten teams is a good game. Teddy sold his ticket because he was able to pay for the whole rest of the season with its asking price. If you were here, you'd buy him another. Brad just might. If you were here, we'd all be going to the game dressed in red. You'd spoil Teddy and all his friends. The boys plan to do that so don't worry: pre-game, post-game and breakfast tomorrow too. Teddy is beyond excited. So are Nay Nay and John. Brad promised to give you a proper birthday toast. You'll love it.

Lily and I will be attending the mass said for you today at our church. It's where I need to be for many reasons.We'll light candles and feel God's grace and hopefully leave feeling a little closer to you too. We have plans for an early dinner. I'm lobbying for Pizza Man so I can have our escargot. It's back on the menu. I checked. We'll toast you too.

And as I'm sitting here ready to sign off, Earth Wind and Fire's Hearts Afire just came on and I just know that it cannot be a coincidence. Thank you for that Mom!

I love you and I miss you, but then you know that.

Krissy