Life has been good and full. That has me flummoxed that September days are waning. And so noticeably shorter. The first day of my favorite season came and went without much thought. I blame it on the warm bonus summer-like days and just being occupied, thus distracted. My front porch is a mish mash of last season's leggy blooms and warty pumpkins I try, but cannot resist. Every morning I pass a row of a dozen maples that are trading in their green for oranges and reds day by day. It's just a block, but the trees that are the furthest north take a little more time to turn. For some reason, I notice and feel the need to document this fall after fall. It's such a poignant symbol of change.
My aunt is here this week and I never anticipated what a blessing the timing of her visit would be. I don't want to say I'm not thinking about my mom...we've been talking about her and reminiscing and that has brought a lightness to the levity that usually defines this week. Seven days between her birthday and her last day...sixty years young.
We took off the band aid and went to church last Sunday. It's been on my mind after a hiatus much longer than I care to admit or excuse. The strong pull was partially to feel close to my mom on her birthday and also to feel my faith in this time of despair. We have a new priest who is all fire and brimstone. He didn't really venture far from the parable of the day and I was so hoping to get some hope to get me through the here and now. All was good though because the whole fam dam was in the house. Candace too, but she's family as well. I had a cathartic cry after communion, lit a candle for McGurk and hugged all my peeps. It was more nourishing than the brunch we had post mass, but that was good too.
Friday we celebrated my dad's 78th. Two family meals in one weekend was a gift for all. He always says no presents, but then he's always tickled by the things we feel no pressure to find. No gifts is for the birds. True graciousness is the act of thankful, heartfelt reception.
Speaking of which, Jess called me last week in the middle of the workday. She never calls during office hours so I answered. She invited me to dinner, but gave me every out. It made me confront the fact that I've declined a lot lately. I'm grateful I said yes. We had a lovely belated birthday dinner on a twinkle-lit patio on a beautiful night. They had to gently suggest we leave because we were lingering. We vowed to do more of this.
I can't remember the last time I went out this much in one week. I've become an unapologetic and very happy homebody. I was planning to host family dinner Wednesday, but my sister-in-law suggested we venture downtown.I surprised myself by how quickly I said yes and never regretted it for a single second because we so enjoyed the city lights from the roof top and then traipsing around the club we used to frequent...The Elephant Room the Bali Room, The ballroom. And without saying...being together. It goes without saying, but there...I said it because we should.
We have a full weekend ahead. Plans are in flux, and that's okay. It doesn't much matter what we do...just that we do do.
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