Grateful Friday

Today I give thanks for...

Six days of exercise this week. It is crucial for mind, body and spirit.

One day I was caught in a snow squall that popped up mid-walk.

Two days later there were signs and smells of spring.

An invitation for lunch with my sister in law yesterday. We had much to catch up on. I'm definitely taking Lily back to this cafe because the sweet potato quesadilla was delicious and so in her wheelhouse.

Heart to hearts with my step-mother and my guy this week.

Peanut and I finished one book early in the week. The Couple Next Door was a 24 hour endeavor. It was a quick even if not all that compelling read. Lots of problems with characters...I didn't like a single one of them. Not to mention the ending was cheap.

I stopped at the library to restock. Never your pretty little mind that I still have a stacks here and there around the house.

I blew through this little beaut of micro memoirs all the while thinking I could have...I should have written this.

A new day a new book. I started this yesterday. It's our April book club selection. I'm enjoying it more than expected. I've found myself laughing out loud numerous times and I'm really rooting for this couple.

These guys. They soak up the sun, and then when they are literally baking they seek the shade.

My sous chef.

There was much cooking in #krissywskitchen this week. The most ambitious meal was my version of Chinese takeout, which will now make it unlikely we'll order from Royal Garden any time soon. I've got all kinds of ideas on egg rolls. How to improve this traditional version and the 101 other possibilities.

This Beef and Broccoli can also use a wee bit of work, but it was scrumptious.

The most delicious dish was this humble pot pie for dinner on 3.14 - Pi Day. This was my best yet and so very simple: store bought crust and rotisserie chicken. I will double the veggies next time and add some peas, which I omitted because the kids refuse them. I am a new fan of a top and a bottom crust.

I surprised on this shy guy the other day.

We saw our first chipmunk this week. That's a sure sign of spring and also that we can expect some snow in the next week. Mother Nature takes pleasure in reminding us just who's boss.

Daffodil's $1.49 a bunch. I bought three. It's unbelievable how happy they make me.

Fresh herbs.

Everyday Life

These days of late winter I'm lovingly dubbing the cat days of winter. I've never spent this much time with my guys. This time could be called the book days or the baking days just as well. Yesterday I read a book. The day before I baked bread.  It was more than turning out a loaf with my rotten fruit though. I took on, tweaked and perfected my banana bread. My regular recipe's been bothering me. Then Lily came home from a friend's recently declaring her mother's banana bread the best and it became a mission to regain my title. I used to make the best. I've determined it's not just about what goes into the bread, but definitely add a little lemon juice. It's also about not over-mixing it and baking it in a greased metal pan low and slow. It 's not lost on me that finding the perfect recipe: combining just the right ingredients and technique is a fitting metaphor for life.

I'm going to admit that these days of nurturing comfort have been a gift. I'm not bored. I don't have cabin fever or ants in my pants. I would happily live this way indefinitely if it weren't in the best interest of my family to resume bringing in some bacon not just cooking it. If I win the lottery, I'll shamelessly put my job search on hold and be perfectly happy reading, writing, cooking, walking and just taking care of my house and my family indefinitely or forever.

On My Mind Monday

"Luxury can only provide short-lived pleasure."

Silence in the Age of Noise

~Erling Kagge

Grateful Friday

Today I give thanks for...

Time. I've been sick this week. Like stay in my pjs and under an afghan all day kind of sick. Aches, chills, ridiculous sneezing fits, a horrendous cough and a box of Kleenex a day runny nose. I was able to not do. I was able to practice self-care. I'm still not feeling great, but things are slowly getting better.

I'm beyond grateful that Lily was in good health for her trip to DC. I don't think it would have been much fun if she felt at all the way that I do and she started to.

She's having a blast in the capitol with her classmates. This is a whirlwind 3 day/3 night tour that has them going from 7 a.m. until 10 p.m. She's been sending me pictures and messages, but I'm anxious to hear all about it when she gets home tonight. Or more likely tomorrow. I expect her to be exhausted tonight. She was most excited to lay the wreath on the Tomb of the Unknowns. She was one of four selected to have the honor. She wrote a compelling essay about why she wanted to have the opportunity. 

Crunchy peanut butter on wheat toast with honey. It was the only thing I wanted to eat.

My appetite and ambition are returning. I just made the menu for next week at Casa Wags. A few family favorites like tacos and spaghetti and a new beef and broccoli stir fry that I think everyone will approve of are the plan. Corned beef too because St. Pat's is on Saturday.

Shamrocks.

I accepted a job. I'm conflicted because I know it won't be long-term unless something really changes, but I'm thinking it may be perfect to get me through the summer after which I can work on finding something full-time and permanent. It will allow me to have flexibility for my kids this summer and that's important. 

An impromptu gathering at my in-laws last Saturday. They've been in Florida for a stretch so it was good to welcome them home and catch up.

Late Winter Inventory

It's been awhile since I've put together an inventory. I especially like to capture what I've read and any new recipes I've tried here. It's a great way to keep a running record.

Reading: I've been reading prolifically. I blame that a bit on the season as in the weather and the season as in my life: winter and unemployment. I started Idaho yesterday and am about halfway through it. It's growing on me.

I'm also about halfway through Katrina Kenison's lastest memoir. Magical Journey was published in 2013. I've been saving it and now I'm savoring it.

I'm also reading Silence in the Age of Noise and relating to this manifesto profoundly. I'm almost through it despite the fact that I've taken my time with it so the thoughts and feelings permeate...set in.

I'm listening to The Woman in the Window while I walk. It's a light Hitchcockian thriller that I've really enjoyed until today. I'm about halfway through and I found myself annoyed by the lack of plot and the redundancy, but then I guess the Master of Suspense is known for revealing as little as possible. I just hope I haven't figured it out.

The Immortalists stands out as the best fiction I've read this year. Yes, all two months of it. Less thought provoking, but somewhat entertaining choices are The Arrangement and The Wife Between Us. They qualify as decent beach reads. My Absolute Darling was disturbing, and yet I'd recommend it to those who can stomach difficult material because Turtle is a character you will never forget. A Man Called Ove was disappointing and rather dull although I appreciated the ending.

The star of the memoir category was Kelly Corrigan's Tell Me More. I wanted more. And I want to be her or at least her friend. I give varying amounts of  praise to The Girl with Seven Names, Nourished, and The Only Girl in the World each for vastly different reasons. Hyeonseo Lee's story of defection from North Korea was timely, but not as compelling as I was expecting and there were many holes. I couldn't shake the feeling that she was reckless rather than courageous.  Lia Huber's food and faith memoir was a bit whiny, but it inspired me to cook. I tried a few of the recipes and there were others I wanted to try, but didn't get to. Maude Julien's story was dark, but redemptive. I think all three of these had issues with voice.

The winner in the poetry category is hands down Devotions. Mary Oliver everyday always forever. Rapi Kuar's the sun and her flowers and milk and honey round out the category. I preferred the former.

Mother Land was sent back to the mother ship (Amazon's Audible) because after months of trying to get into it, I simply had to get rid of it. The characters were insufferable and the story slow. I was surprised that they took it back after months of it sitting on my cue.

Eating: #krissywskitchen has been busy. Attributable again to the time of year and the current circumstances of life. Comfort food has been the focus and cast iron cooking a recurring theme for all meals including desserts. Last month we discovered the Skillet Cookie and our lives will never be the same. It's a one bowl, one pan hot out of the oven treat that I'm still tweaking to get just right. I made the kids' favorite French Silk Pie for Valentine's Day. It's an annual tradition because #foodislove. I tried a recipe for a French Chocolate Cake that became my sister-in-law's birthday treat. I followed Deb's recipe to a tee and I loved the intensely chocolate flavor and the crumbly texture. The icing on the cake hit was the chocolate whipped cream, which was light and perfect with fresh raspberries. Just last week I decided to make Focaccia. I doubled this recipe for my 12 inch skillet and omitted the rosemary and it was perfect: crunchy on the bottom, soft inside and a little crusty on top. Half the round was gone before dinner as my family kept coming in and stealing slices. New in our pasta rotation is this Orecchiette with Bacon and Lemon Cream recipe. It's easy and surprisingly light. I add peas and a little fresh Parmesan. And I need to tell you that this method for rendering bacon is the only way I will do it from here on out.

Watching: Well, I'm not proud to admit this, but I got sucked into The Bachelor this season. It was so weird. He was weird and I didn't understand his relationships. Plus, I was so tired of him saying, "I love that," and then going in for the awkward kiss. I think he picked Lauren who appeared to have the personality of a wet noodle because she so closely resembles Emily. She broke his heart the last time he was on the show. His break-up with Becca was cringe-worthy, but I guess they signed up for this. She seemed to get over him in a nano second leading me to believe she's really in it to find fame...not love. I'm still loving This is Us, How to Get Away With Murder and Survivor. I'm thinking about starting The Crown because everyone is raving about it, and I'm tempted to order Showtime so we can catch this latest season of Homeland. I casually watched the Academy Awards last week and I was perplexed. I didn't see The Shape of Water, and I didn't care for Three Billboards. I wanted to see Call Me by Your Name, and I loved Ladybird. Get Out was fine, but Oscar worthy? Not imo. I'm sure I'll see Darkest Hour, Phantom Thread and The Post at some point. I guess I was just not feeling it this year.

Lily and I saw and loved Waitress in January. It was a delicious show.

Listening to: When I'm home during the day, I like the house silent. No music, no television. I tune into the meditative rhythm of the clocks counting away the seconds and in the past week, I feel lifted up by vibrant birdsong that's filling the yard. When I'm fragile, I steer clear of the songs.

Feeling: Fragile. It's been a tough couple months for various reasons. I have unresolved feelings about many things. I'm hurt and sad that I haven't heard from my dad since December. I reached out in January via a note that I thought was a kind and thoughtful gesture. Nothing. It's what I got in return. I suppose that the valuable lesson in this - what I need to take away - is that I will never put my children in this position because I know how it feels. I'll never turn my back on them or abandon them. I think what hurts the most is that I confessed to him that I really need my dad right now and he's still choosing to be absent. I don't understand it because for as long as I live, I know when my kids say they need me, I'll be there with bells on no matter what. The situation with my cousin is still not 100% resolved. I responded to her email after the holidays in what I thought was a thoughtful manner. Carefully because I don't trust her, but also without anger or accusation. She fired back angry. Angry because I'm not letting her manipulate me and cross boundaries anymore. I shut down and didn't respond. There's no point because I realize that I do not want a relationship with her right now and maybe never. That has been weighing on me because she is family and she is contacting other family members trying to stab me and sway them. There's a whole lot I want to say, but I won't.

Wanting: Peace in my family. A job that I love working with good people I respect. Creative energy. Confidence. Clarity. A crystal ball would be nice.

Thinking: About the kind of legacy I want to leave here on earth, and trying hard to convince myself it's not too late to think big.

Loving: The way Peanut snuggles up with me after the morning rush. I enjoy my coffee and my book and he enjoys being close. The funny noises Tigger makes when he's surprised in his sleep. The way Teddy walks around speaking Spanish all the time or singing loudly. Lily's texts. She's in D.C. on her class trip and she's giving me the play by play. She's having an absolute blast. The way my husband has given me the perfect combination of support and space lately as I'm working hard to figure things out. My family.

On My Mind Monday

Nobody picks their life...you make choices, and then they make choices. Your choices make choices.

~ Chloe Benjamin

The Immortalists

Grateful Friday

Today I give thanks for...

Meeting my friend for breakfast last week and staying until lunch. We could've talked straight through dinner.

I suggested a place in between, but she wanted to come down to my side of town our old stomping grounds.

Authenticity, honesty, kindness and connection.

The safety of being in the company of people who know you and get you and love you.

Changing things up. I've been working in the kitchen where I have lots of space to spread out. This guy is my constant companion.

We don't normally have blankets at the kitchen table.

The music from The Adam's Family, but especially One Normal Night and Full Disclosure. Also Pulled sung by our Wednesday Cate whose voice and stage presence never cease to amaze us. 

A ladies lunch to celebrate the February girls. La Reve is always a treat.

The desserts were delicious...especially the one in the middle.

Bringing home one for Ted who texted me during lunch to tell me he destroyed the ACT that day.

He's a raspberry guy.

Sending the birthday girls home with fresh flowers.

Looks like spring.

Waiting for your turn with only a hint of stink eye. My boys love to be brushed.

Mike is their preferred groomer.

They also love to watch the squirrels.

 Eating apples.

A stack of new reads waiting for me at the library.

I started with The Immortalists and blew through it in a couple days. I was a big fan of the sibling story that dealt with themes of mortality and destiny. It was well-written and thought provoking. 

I didn't want it to end, but also couldn't wait to see how it would turn out.

8th grade portraits.

This captures her beautifully.

This moon.

Full.