Dear Teddy,

I'm the mother to an 18 year old for a couple days now and not much has changed. You see no matter your age, you'll always be my baby. You made me a mom on December 27th, 2000 after 8 hours of labor, and it's been a labor of love ever since. It's the most rewarding, most cherished job I've ever had and to see you grow into such a fine young man with a bright future in your purview makes my heart happy. It's all we want for our children...to find their way with smiles on their faces, love in their hearts and peace in their souls. 

It's all about roots and wings...providing you with a solid foundation and then helping you dream big. You know that as you go out in the world to live your passions, you always have a safe and loving home to return to. It's why we spend so much time trying to teach you brick by brick the important stuff. Practical things like write thank yous when you receive a gift because the expression of gratitude is never overrated. Little things like speak when spoken to, and engage, ask questions, then listen. The art of communication is priceless. Since you were just a little shaver, I'd get compliments about your personable and polished conversational skills. All your friends parents and older siblings loved you. They still do because you are outgoing and funny and friendly. Make your bed, brush your teeth and wear your retainer. Those straight teeth of yours cost us almost 10k! Eat your daily 5. Your body is a temple and you must treat it as such. The truth is that you eat better than I do these days and you are strong and fit. You work out nearly every day.

There are also the less tangible, but even more important things that your dad and I've tried to instill in you. Things like humility, compassion, faith and kindness. You know that you are the center of our world together with your sister, but not THE world. You also know that your world is blessed and that we must care for those who do not share our bounty. You know that you are entitled to be proud of your strengths in school and sports, but that there is no need to boast or let your ego get big. You have seen conflict and you've learned lessons of forgiveness. You've experienced loss and witnessed grief. In this house...in this family...we feel our feelings. Good and bad.

As much as we've taught you, you've been teaching us all along too. Being a mother has opened my heart in ways I never thought possible. It's true when you have children, you understand what it means to live with your heart outside your body. When you hurt, I hurt. I've had to learn that I cannot fix your slights or take away your pain. I can only be here for you as you weather your storms. 

I've also learned that I have to say no sometimes. You probably think that I enjoy it, but I never want to say no to you dangerous situations aside. I want to spoil you rotten, but that doesn't do you any good. There are times I must nag, prod and probe as much as it annoys you. It's my job to ask questions, to tell you to drive safely, to remind you to do your chores. I'm your mom not your friend. I have to let you make your own decisions even when I don't necessarily agree with them. You are going to forgo your spot as captain of the golf team this year for one last season of baseball. I'll be in the stands cheering. I trust you because I know what kind of person you are.

I insist on a hug before you leave for school every morning and I try to tell you that I love you before bed every night. You may not need these things right now, but I need to you to know that I do.

I love you to the moon and back forever and ever.

Mom