My Truisms

Gretchen Rubin talks about many things in the Happiness Project that got my interested attention.  Her concept of true rules is one of them.  True rules consist of words of wisdom, practical tidbits and inner speak we pick up along the way from parents, mentors, peers and such.  Because we all come from different places and are traveling to our unique destinations, our rules are just that: our rules.  Every one's will be custom acquired and fit.  I prefer to think of them as truisms because some of the codes of conduct that filter through my mind every day are ways to do (rules) but more are ways to be (isms). This is my short list:

It is what it is.  It's a dandy I attribute to my Mom who was a wise woman.  Early in life she learned to live in and for the moment and also to be strong in the face of adversity.  She would say this not with a defeatist tone, but rather with an air of acknowledgement and attack ala what are we gonna do about it.

When life feels like too much, smile, nod and wear beige.  We all have bad days.  And bad days don't discriminate.  Sometimes that out of sorts feeling sets in on a day you don't have the luxury of checking out of.  So show up with a smile, but then blend in.  Chances are you'll feel better after for acting the way you don't feel and for keeping your commitment.

You cannot change what you do not acknowledge.  You know who says this?  Dr. Phil.  It's one of those things he's said that makes me think he actually is a licensed professional and not just an Oprah-made star.  It's so true though.  As soon as you admit that something is lacking or wrong in your relationships, work, self, the world, you can go about making a change, and not a second sooner.

You have to shut your eyes in order to see.  This is the one that reminds me to sleep on it.  Perspective and clarity are often revealed when I take step back or check out, and I'm usually glad I chose not to act in the heat of the moment.  Every thing looks different in new light.

We cannot become what we want to be by remaining what we are.  No, we have to step out of our comfort zones to grow.  We have to take chances and calculated risks to reap rewards.  I have not been faithfully adhering to this one.

Stars cannot shine without darkness.  Life is a series of necessary contradictions:  light/dark, joy/sorrow, birth/death, hot/cold, peace/turmoil.  The sadness I have felt heightens the joy I feel.  Yesterday's tears enhance today's laughter.  The human experience exists on this spectrum.  We have to take and experience the good in relationship to the bad.

Sometimes you can be so happy, you are sad.  This is one I whisper to myself when I am experiencing the apex of my joy.  It's at this point that I start to sense the shift in the continuum and I feel the fleetingness of what is as what was.

Just do it! Thanks Nike.

Everyday make your bed.  At the end of the day, there is nothing better than crawling between crisp, smooth sheets.

Always send Thank you notes to acknowledge gifts and kind acts.  This is such a lost art, but it is not lost on me and it will not be lost on my kids.

Get up at almost the same time every day.  It makes Monday so much easier, and Saturday and Sunday so much longer.

Leave your shoes at the door.  Dirty floors are my nemesis and dirty feet the bane of my existence.

Always say please and thank you with sincerity in your home, at your place of work, at school, in public.  These words are not just for children either. 

Always finish what you start.  I used to pride myself on this one.  Lately, not so much.  It's troubling me to the point that I have been avoiding starting things out of fear I won't finish them.