Wednesday, September 24, 2008

(Excerpt from personal journal)

 
My Mom has only been awake for a few, quiet moments today. She roused long enough to take her medication, eat half a long john and blow me a kiss. It hasn't been silent in here though. I have been reading to her stories of miracles, prayers answered, after death communications. She is listening. She is listening. I have been talking to her...telling her that I know she will always be with me and the kids, that I will always love her. I can tell that she is listening by the fluttering of her eye lashes and the changes in her breathing. She is hearing. She is hearing. Now I'm playing Watermark and singing to her as I hold her hand in mine. She is calm. Relaxed. I hope it is soothing her. It certainly has that affect on me. It is what I need, but I want to give her what she needs. I am listening...wanting to hear whatever it is she needs to know I am near and that she need not fear.
It has been difficult for me being alone here the past few days, but this morning I realized that I am not alone and I never will be. I am beyond thankful for this morning's tender moments and talks of truths...the time we shared just the two of us. This is time I will never get back.  I'll sit here beside her for as long as she needs me.