Grateful Friday

Today it's not about what I am thankful for, but who...

My Mom...she gave me life and taught me how best to live it. Two remarkable gifts I rejoice in every day, but especially on my birthday, which happens to be today. She is my mentor, my best friend, my rock and now my guardian angel. I wish I would have listened all the times she whispered my birth story because it went to the grave with her, but at least our life story is mine to tell.

My Dad...he too gave me life and then showed me how to enjoy every moment fully embracing his title as Disneyland Daddy. Today he is Disneyland Grandpa, but he's not all fun and games. My Dad is the salt of my earth...wise and deep and strong.

My husband...he is a remarkable man - a devoted husband and a hands and hearts on father. We are polar opposites in so many ways, and yet we attract, adhere, advance and adore. We'll be married 14 years in October, and I feel it in my heart that we'll be together forever.

My son...my first born...who taught me what it feels like to have my heart beat outside my body. The beautiful, bright boy I loved wholey the moment I held him and who I love more each day I know him.

My daughter...my mini me...she is equal parts percocious, and precious and I wouldn't have it any other way. She makes me want to be the very best mom and woman I can be .

My brother...one of my best friends and the closest link I have to my Mom. We share more history together than with any other and thus have an incredible, unspoken, unbreakable bond.

His fiance, my soon-to-be sister (in-law). They found one another for a reason: how uncanny is such shared experience. I am thankful not only that she makes him happy, but that she also embraces the rest of his sometimes loveable and always crazy family.

My friend Jess who knows all my secrets and has finally learned to keep them. We talk multiple times a day, and yet, we never run out of things to talk about. She's my walking partner, my wine drinking sidekick, my conscience and my confidant. She's an important part of my family and a welcome and constant presence in our lives.

My frister Kristen...she has been my friend since we were kids...silly girls practicing our kissing techniques on the pillows we made in home economics, and I know that we'll be fristers forever. She's risked her life for me (Judge's barroom brawl) and has always been there beside me whether in good times, bad, mad or sad. She knows me so well, and really understands and accepts me.

My Aunt...my Dad's youngest sister. She was 10 when I was born, and couldn't get enough of me. There were times when I was growing up that I was positively convinced that she was really my mother and it was all a big cover-up. She's one of the best people I know...a constant in my life.... someone I look up to and strive to emulate, and the one family member I can call any time of day or night and she will pick up the phone and we'll talk until one of our phones run out of batteries.

My friend Candace who I can laugh until I cry with or cry until I laugh with. She is like my slightly older sister...always available to lend an ear and offer thoughtful advice. She has an enormous heart and a giving spirit.

My friend Rose who is the prankster among us always keeping us on our toes and making us laugh, but she's surprised me in other ways this past year. During the struggles endured as my Mom fought in her last year, I saw that Rose is not only a breath of fresh air, but also real and wise and generous beyond belief. So many nights have we sat up talking until everything made sense (at least until morning). I cannot fathom a Roseless life. We don't talk every day, but when we do connect, it's as if no time has passed.

My step-mom who loves my Dad despite the fact that he is sometimes difficult to live with. She loves my brother and I, but never tried to replace my Mom. She relishes her role as Grandma and is darn good at it. She reminds me to be kind and nonjudgemental.

My cousin Carol who I am close with despite the distance in miles and years between us. She calls often just to say "hi" and to offer me words of encouragement and praise. She reminds me not to put off until tomorrow what I can do today.

My mother-in-law who most importantly is the reason my hubby is here, and also hugely responsible for the man he is today. She is kind and generous and fair and fun. She sees the good in all things...in every one.

My father-in-law who is witty and has such a sharp sense of humor. We like to share sarcastic jabs. He too focuses on the positive in life.

My friend Kathy who grew up with my Mom. She checks in often just to remind me that she's there if I need her. I love the way she calls me "dear." I love the way that she always knows what to say.

My friend Mary who is my Mom's oldest friend. She is sweet and so kind. She always makes me laugh because she can be goofy and snarky and all while being one of the nicest people I have ever known.

Almost all my co-workers who supported me during the past almost 2 years and still don't expect me to be "all right." They have been compassionate and supportive in ways both big and small.

Father T. who came to visit my Mom at home when she could no longer make it to church. Almost every time I see him he still mentions my Mom and asks me how I'm doing. When I'm in his presence I do feel my spirit lifted.

My Mom's neighbors who were there for my her...for our family...until the very end, and beyond. Whether she needed help getting somewhere, shopping, taking care of her yard, they were there. They were there to lend a hand, an ear, or a shoulder. Scarcely a day passed that we didn't find a casserole, a dessert, a plant, a bottle of wine or a card on the porch.

So 39 was a difficult year, but thanks to these loved ones and others I have not mentioned, there was one thing that I never felt...alone. And now you know why.