de ja vu

It's Tuesday morning and I'm enjoying the quiet of my house alone with my coffee, cats and computer. It's just like old times. T. Bone and Miss Bit are still catching up on sleep so I'm thinking I may see them around dinnertime tonight, although the phone just rang threatening to cut their slumber short...wrong number. I gave the lady on the other end a piece of my mind, and usually I'm cordial to and forgiving with errant dialers. I guess not when I'm protecting my babes and their REM. Shhh, but I may have a slight tendency to go a tad commando when my AWOL time is jeopardized as well.

I've missed my blog time something awful. I just don't feel right when I'm short on time to write. Good things have come from being "off the grid" nonetheless. I've been connecting to places other than the WWW, and yet I'm forever in search of the ever elusive idea of attaining balance. I know the fact that I struggle with it every day puts me in some capable company. It's been occupying my thoughts more often than not lately. Probably because I'm noticing how I've been prone to extremes: walking the distance of a marathon in one week, or not taking a single step; picking up yet another fast food meal, or spending the better part of the day in the kitchen making a four course meal; reading three books at once, or not even bothering with a quick magazine article; wanting summer to last forever, or wishing away the horrendously humid days that have hung over us; feeling invincible one day and defeated the next; wanting to go and do, or needing to stay and be. I need a road map to navigate these twists, turns and detours.

And I guess that's what I miss most about writing: the sense of direction it affords me. Expression is my inner compass, and without it I quickly find myself lost. Recognizing the bypass, realizing the roundabout is the first step to finding my way out. The good thing is that I've already seen this and I know what to do.