Not Me! Monday

I absolutely did not leave my daughter at day care an extra hour so I could watch Oprah's After Oscar show this afternoon uninterrupted because a) I am so over Oprah b) I am way over Hollywood and c) I am a much better mother than that! That being said, I am not at all glad that Slum Dog (the little Indy film) took away 8 Oscars. Go Bollywood!

When I realized that the stock market is at its lowest levels since 1997, I did not start researching non-socialist foreign countries to move to...no, not me!

I did not sit in the bleachers at my son's basketball game yesterday and spend as much time watching the other cell phone frenzied parents as the kids who deserved my attention and then make a mental note to self: do not succumb to laissez faire parenting lest children grow into obnoxious adults!

It is not true that I washed a single pair of shorts so that my son would not have to play his last game minus his "lucky red shorts." Incidentally, they won!

I did not make an appointment with my hair stylist for my son because I would never try to subvert his hippy/bohemian style...I just like to see his gorgeous eyes and know that K. will help us meet in the middle.

There is no way that I served my kids the exact same meal as they had last night because there is no way that my kids are THE MOST uninspiring people to cook for.

It is not possible that when I called my husband on my way to work this morning (because it is so not true that I pick up the phone the minute I am alone in my car) and I got a "this number has been disconnected" that I didn't immediately call his cell phone because you know the economy is stabilizing and I do not know way too many people who have lost jobs.

I am not letting my kids have a sundae with the works for dessert the last couple nights because they are not giving up ice cream for Lent starting Wednesday.

It is not true that I spent some time while my kids were at Sunday school yesterday trying to master certain Wii Fit games.