2 day pass

sweet relief fell on friday after the week's jarring reentry to routine.

kiddie cocktails with extra cherries...a bribe for my girl to let me teach her backgammon on a slow eve...

a game she is almost ready for, but not quite.

she had a play date with grandma and grandpa after swimming on saturday...

they went to see 7 brides for 7 brothers...

she said it was "olden," but good.

he had his first baseball game of the season and we had our last bowling night...

they won....

we took second place.

second place for the season!

sunday the boys went to practice and she spent all afternoon outside with her bff.

i kept myself busy puttering here and there...mostly in the kitchen.

it was a glorious day...inside and out!

i stuffed a chicken with halved lemons and garlic and a handful of thyme.

i mashed potatoes, made salad dressing and tried a new brussels sprout recipe.

jess joined us for dinner and the evening turned to night much too soon.

i have such a love hate relationship with sunday.

it is a day of beginnings and endings...

starts and finishes...

hellos and...

goodbyes.

9 Year Old Wisdom

She came home from swim practice the other night and announced, "I like Coach D!"  Just before practice she declared, "I don't like Coach D.  He's cranky!"

The reason behind the 60 minute change of heart was a rather impressive compliment Coach paid her. He told her that her kicks were high school kicks and then she told me, "To think that all it took was a compliment."

Recognition when earned and praise when deserved go a long way,  Even my 9 year old knows that.

I think she'll kick her way through the rest of the season without complaint.

Grateful Friday

Today I give thanks for...

Looking for the light.  Reaching and growing.

I finished The Fault in Our Stars. I found it to be realistic rather than pessimistic because I believe pain is a side affect of living as well as dying.  I loved the literary references throughout.

Sacred mother daughter moments.  I was talking about angels with Miss Bit during our commute the other day.  The conversation was sparked by my audiobook  I was trying to give her the 9 year old synopsis.  In true Lily form, she wasn't satisfied with the milk toast version.  Before she got out of the car, we were both in tears.  Happy tears.  She asked me if I believe in angels.  I shared the story of the night I felt them, and that's when the beautiful tears flowed.

Heart to hearts too.  This week not just about near death experiences and angels, but also being a good friend, and the importance of choosing good friends, and that we do, in fact, have a choice.  Puberty and raging emotions too.  Heavy stuff, and so so important.

My daughter is such a sweet soul and wise beyond her years.

But she's also just 9.  Case in point...she's swinging her heart out on the swing set and belting out tunes in the backyard all by herself as I type.

That voice.  I may be biased, but it's so beautiful.  A parishioner in the pew in front of us kept looking back at her last week during mass.  I noticed.  She noticed.  And I told her what I believe to be true: that she couldn't believe such a beautiful voice could come out of such a young girl.  It was a little bit divine. 

I've been moonlighting as a short order cook now that spring sports are almost in full swing at Casa Wags, and I'm becoming pretty good at it.  Something tells me that this is going to be more the norm than an exception.

Toms.  I bought Miss Bit a pair.  They are worth the $50+ price tag because she wears them everyday and they look a-dorable with everything.

My sous baker.  She decorated this almost all by herself!  It was almost too pretty to eat, but somehow we managed.

Easter hymns.  The music last Sunday moved me to tears.  My favorite was the hymn set to the Pachelbel Canon.

The way T. Bone offers me the top of his head to kiss before bed.  I'd rather a cheek, but I am just gladder than glad he still wants to be tucked in at all.

He has a voice too.  He sings through his shower and is also known to burst into song in the middle of his homework or dinner or really any old time.

Most nights he falls asleep with his light on book in hand, and that's when I steal a smooch on the cheek.

My kids...they think they're so different, but they're also much the same.  They both love Castle, Mine Craft, sausage roni pizzas and their cats.  They're both scared of spiders and split pea soup.  They both dislike cereal with milk and scary movies.  They are both confident and compassionate.  They have the bluest blue eyes.

Remembering when T. Bone was just a little shaver. He's not a very willing photo subject these days.

 

The Muppets.  I recently took Miss Bit and her friends to see the latest Muppet movie.  It was my first, and while I understand it was not one of their best...or better...I laughed a lot and found the whole thing clever, cute and oddly nostalgic.  Now I'm working my way through the backlog.

The steadfast coo of the morning dove...so sad and yet so hopeful.  I find it uncanny that it's often the first bird I hear in the morning and the last at night. 

 

T. Bone has his first baseball game Saturday and his first tennis match next week.

 

I found my address book.

 

Company while I blog. 

 

Last night I couldn't sleep for long enough that I moved downstairs to the family room couch.  This guy curled up at my feet right away and purred so loudly for so long it almost lulled me to sleep.  Forget counting sheep...ultimately, reciting poems I've memorized over the years did the trick.

My ideas journal.  It's where I record my daily mind dump so I can remember all those things I don't want to forget and make room for all the things I have to remember.
 

Raspberry vinaigrette.  Over spinach topped with pear, pecans, red onion and blue cheese.

Orchids.  They love my living room. 
 



 

Shhh...but after a week off, I was happy to go back to work yesterday.

 

And now it's the weekend again.

Trust in Time

I was reminded of a rather humbling lesson today.

It's been a rough couple of days.  Days that made me want to hide from the sun shining on the ever warming world.   The kind of days that take extra effort to get through and render usual comforts, chores.  Things like reading, fresh air hikes, and cooking, which are almost never arduous.  I finished a book, I walked many miles, and I made use of my ham bone for soup, yet still I felt burden not relief.

There are reasons for the malaise. Identifiable causes, but right now they seem so much smaller and less significant, which means there were reasons.  Already on the verge of past tense.  There will always be reasons...worries and wrongs to wallow in and that weigh upon.  I know this so the agitator is in mismanaging my reactions.  Mostly my overreactions.  Ala the only person I can control and/or change is myself.

And yet to know this truth and accept its responsibility, doesn't always make its implementation possible or likely.  Sometimes it takes some time so all bouts of self lamentation and every internal pep talk only make me feel more hopeless and heavy.  Time, it heals. Trite, but also true.

This morning I woke up recognizing all of yesterday's gifts.  Favors that just the day before I wasn't ready to honor.  My heart was too heavy...my head too hazy to accept them.  I was off center, akimbo and out of balance.  This morning I felt so much more myself as I pulled out of the driveway and chanted my daily nod to Prufrock:

Let us go then, you and I,
When the evening is spread out against the sky
Like a patient etherized upon a table;
Let us go, through certain half-deserted streets,
The muttering retreats
Of restless nights in one-night cheap hotels
And sawdust restaurants with oyster-shells:
Streets that follow like a tedious argument
Of insidious intent
To lead you to an overwhelming question. . .
Oh, do not ask, "What is it?"
Let us go and make our visit.

In the room the women come and go
Talking of Michelangelo.

Miss Bit always gives me a you're so strange mom sideways glance when I  recite the opening stanza.  I think I may even do it to annoy her now, but today the words I rotely utter made me excited to read Eliot's monologue again in entirety.  I haven't read it through since college.  I was excited because Hazel quoted the same part of Prufrock for Augustus.  That small text to world connection woke me up to so many thoughts and feelings I have today with regard to a book that yesterday I was numb to as I read the last page.  This morning I edited the photo I almost didn't bother to take during yesterday's walk. Today I appreciate my capture of two hawks hawking.  The batch of soup I didn't think I put much love into yesterday, proves itself forgiving today as I enjoyed a bowl.

Today I'm remembering what a difference a day (or two) can make.

Post Break Blues

Miss Bit painted this yesterday.

She's into quotes and painting...she's into painting quotes.
Be still my heart.
We were painting because a front came through mid day turning temperatures cooler and bringing a little spring rain.
That was right after I'd opened every single window in the house to let in the warm, fresh air and suggested a hike.
She was already on the down yo...feeling sad that we were able to measure vacation left in hours not days.
we didn't go anywhere over the break, but we still enjoyed a change of pace and plenty of fun outings.
It was sort of a hectic week trying to get in my hours at work, keep them entertained and ready the house for an Easter gathering.
Now I'm on a bit of a down yo myself.

She couldn't sleep last night.
I couldn't sleep enough.
I struggled to get out of bed to get the day started.
Yet this morning she rose quickly and was cheerful.
I guess my pep talk with regard to a short week ahead and only 36 school days until summer vacation made an impact.
The countdown is on.
And it's true...Even if your best moments r gone, there's always more to come!

P.S. I had...HAD...to add the comma.

2 day pass

the easter bunny came.
He was risen.
family gathered.
warm weather graced us.
it was all things spring, rebirth, renewal.

the bunny left baskets of goodies edible and other.
He brought joy and hope.
family came bearing casseroles, cakes, champs, flowers and more baskets.
mother nature delivered a much welcome spring to our steps.
it was a day of goodies and goodness.

we gathered on the patio and in the yard.
the kids found eggs, ate too much candy and quickly ditched their easter duds for shorts and flip flops.
the cats eyed us with envy from every open window.
and at the end of the day we were warm and full in both body and spirit.

Grateful Friday

Today I give thanks in pictures instead of words...