Grateful Friday

Jennifer Lawrence winning for Silver Linings Playbook.  I thought she was so humble and heartfelt in her acceptance of the award and I love her even more for stumbling and then getting right back up and making light of it.  I am boycotting ABC.  They showed her little fall no less than 3 times in the hour I watched The Today Show the next morning.  Of all the moments of the night, they chose to capitalize on that?  Shame.

A game of  Wits and Wagers with my family Saturday night.  It is all of our all time favorite board game.  

A fireball of a full moon this week.  So magnificent the picture paled in comparison and was deleted.

Happy Birthday celebrations that end with flutes of champagne and my super famous flourless chocolate cake topped with chocolate ganache and raspberries and served over homemade vanilla bean sauce.

A sure sign of spring in the air...when these two sleep separately.

Pure, true unconditional love and ceaseless snuggles.

Cantaloupe with blueberries.

Baked french toast.  I planned on serving this as a surprise for the kids Wednesday morning.  I set my alarm early to put it in the oven.  When I came downstairs, I was welcomed by a whole world of white.  The streets had yet to be plowed.  My no school suspicions were soon confirmed.  So I cozied in with my book and waited for the rest of the house to wake up before leisurely making breakfast.  It was the perfect morning to have a special treat to serve.

A mid week day of respite and revelry thanks to the snow.  The phone first rang at 7:20.  It was T. Bone's friend just trying to get a plan for the fun day.  More calls were soon to follow.  Miss Bit's friend was face timing her by 7:30.  So much for peace and quiet, but the kids had a good wet winter time.

Snow blowers.

Miss Bit and Coach are reading the first Harry Potter book together.

A roasted chicken that was met with awesome approval by the whole family this week.

Miss Bit's conference. Her teacher is once again quite smitten with just about everything about her.

The kids both have invitations with friends this evening.  I have a date with aunt Jess.  Coach gets a quiet night at home.

Hide and seek.

Scenes From A Snow Day

A brave little bird comes out in search of breakfast while one big cat dreams of eating him for his.

Serendipitous that I had this baked French toast ready to pop in the oven.  Scrumptious too!

Tigger is serious about birdie (pronounced boydee) patrol.

T. Bone atop one of the 25 foot pines in our yard.

Going up was much easier than coming down.  I think he learned his lesson.

There is no picture of me outside in my pajamas trying to coax him down.

Whew! Back on the ground.

All along Miss Bit was saying, "I told you so."

When sledding sounds like surfing.

When I hear snow day I think stay cozy at home.  When they hear snow day they wonder where they can go...what they can do.  They won.

The frozen shores of Lake Michigan.

T. Bone's wearing my jacket after soaking through his.  Had I seen these girlies eyeing the boys up, I may not have retreated to my car with my book.

My peace comes on snow day's eve.  There is nothing like a glass of champagne at the end of a school proclaimed holiday.

The Long and Winding Road

I feel a ramble coming on.  Let this opening announcement serve as warning: I have no earthly idea what direction I may take today. There are likely to be detours, wrong turns, roundabouts and dead ends.  I fear I may even run out of gas.  If you come along for the ride, just fasten your seat belt.

I came here this morning intent on booking a trip.  A trip to NYC.  A long weekend to be spent in the Big Apple in 2 short weeks. I have been on many sites.  One even posted that rooms at the Waldorf could be secured for $250/night.  That is a steal.  All desirable flights have at best 2 seats left...we need 3.  I'm getting a headache before I even take on theater tickets or the perils of packing for NYC in March.  I am getting heart palpitations even thinking about pulling the trigger, which lends me to believe that I should put the weapon (wallet) down.  I am sad to say that I am not spontaneous enough (or decisive if I am being completely honest) to pull this off.  I wanted to...I really did.  I'm also not strong enough right now.  I'm thin skinned, fragile and needy.  Even in my mightiest manic moment, I know that NYC is a very bad fit for me right now. I'm sad because I wanted to celebrate an important graduation.  I wanted to finally visit Ground Zero.  I was hungry to eat in Little Italy.  I dreamed of taking Miss Bit on a horse drawn carriage ride through Central Park and to see a show on Broadway.  I longed to say YES!  Saying No, I don't think so feels so much like defeat.

And the scariest part is that I really don't have a longing desire to go anywhere.  Ever.  I just want to stay here.  Home.  I have no desire for the hustle and bustle, or itineraries or strange beds even if they come with beautiful views.  Traveling right now seems like too much work for too little reward.  The kind of vacation that presently appeals to me is a month with absolutely nothing to see or do.  Capisce?

So now that I'm being completely honest about what is congruous with my current state of mind, do I dare even delve into why I am feeling this way?  What is causing this low level anxiety, this plague of paralysis, this Oblomov like mood?  Is it middle age?  Middle life?  The middle of winter?  Is it malaise?  Or mindfulness?

I can attest to the fact that I have had more than my fair share of aha moments lately.  Processing is hard work.  Synthesizing is draining.  Assimilating is no walk in the park.  And while the truth is ultimately liberating, it takes a little time to know what to do with it.  I haven't grown my wings yet.  Instead I find myself sitting around wondering where to go from here with both feet firmly planted on the ground not willing to budge an inch in any direction lest I make the same mistakes again or take the same missteps.  I think about what I would have done differently if I had known about myself, about life what I know now.  And then I get stuck on what I don't yet know.

I remember my Aunt who is only 10 years older and wiser than I am, telling me when I was 20, When you're 20 you think you know everything...just wait until your 30.  When I was 30 she said, When you're 30 you think you have all the answers, just wait until your 40.  Then when I was 40, she held the carrot out yet another decade.  And what do you know...she's been right every time.

I don't want to live from a place of fear or regret  I want to embrace choices and look back with confident conviction.

Cat's Got My Tongue...

This tempting tray of baked goods has his.

Telling

The contents of my grocery bag today are very telling of my state of mind.

This Week's Menu

Last week we didn't stick to the meal plan.  Life happened and we adjusted so this week I'll be making the Linguine with Asparagus and Poached Egg, and the Denver Frittata that I didn't make last week.

Also on the menu:

Taco Stuffed Bell Peppers with Avacado Salad, or just tacos for the kids.

Whole Roasted Chicken with Cauliflower Gratin and Tossed Salad.

I've never made this gratin before, but it sounds delicious.  How could combining cauliflower, butter, Mascarpone and Parmesan cheese, cream, garlic and salt and pepper not be?  I'm pretty certain the kids will even approve of this one.

The Deconstructed Guacamole Salad is Ina's recipe, but I'm too lazy to look it up right now.  Basically it's avacado, jalapeno, tomato, lime juice and garlic.  I usually make it in the summer, but I think it sounds good this week.

Grateful Friday

Today I give thanks for...

The boys had the slopes mostly to themselves on Monday.  T. Bone and his friend A. were the first on the lift.  Z. and J. were close behind.

While winding down on Monday night, T. Bone was telling me about his day.  He had much fun with his friends.  The four of them are great guys.  They are kind, smart, considerate, well-mannered and silly in ways that most twelve year old boys are.  I am so thankful that T. Bone has a core group of good friends who are good people.  

This conversation in my jam packed van Little Swiss bound.  The boys had just finished breakfast and were gorging on Sour Patch Kids, but they were already talking about lunch.

T. Bone: Will we eat at the sit down restaurant?

A: Yea. Of course.

T. Bone: Dudes will the waiters serve us?

A: Yea. Duh. (holding up a very large bill)

I was also thankful that they left a $10 tip on their $38 tab.

We stood around watching at the bottom of the hill for awhile.  Miss Bit expressed a strong interest in learning to ski.  

A day to spoil my girl sweet: her favorite store, her most loved lunch and a trip to the museum.  We both chose a new pair of earrings to remember the day by.  She ended up with amethysts.  I chose a howlite pair.

Finally a butterfly landed on my girl.  I knew we were not getting out of that 90 degree exhibit with 100 percent humidity until one did.  Unfortunately, the first one landed on her back.  I took this picture to show her, but she wasn't budging until one of the winged beauties landed on her hand.  

 Soon after....one did.

Sandwiches.  Grilled  cheese and egg salad this week on whole wheat sour dough.

After a long day Saturday, I came home to new magazines in my mailbox.  I curled up with a mug of hot tea and enjoyed a little lost time.

The Academy Awards are this weekend.  We used to host a party on Oscar night.  That was many moons ago...before kids.  We won't be making any crabby snacks or homemades for Sunday night, but I am looking forward to the show.  It's the first time in a long time that I have seen many of the contenders.  This week I crossed Zero Dark Thirty off the list.  I hope to see Lincoln this weekend too.

A bunch of assorted tulips from a friend this week.

Noticing that there is more brightness in the sky when I wake up in the morning, and also that darkness is setting in later at the end of the day.  The days are definitely getting longer.

The kids are outside playing together in the snow that fell overnight.