Grateful Friday

Today I'm grateful for long lasting friendship and saying yes.

One week ago I was on an airplane bound for Phoenix. The reunion of my college crew was not a vacation, but a mission. One of us is in need. Saying no or not now was not an option. This is a little out of my comfort zone in that it was last minute, but definitely in my wheelhouse to be.here.now. When I tell you that this trip was life changing, I am not being dramatic. It touched me deeply on many levels and reminded me of the strength and beauty of  kindred connection. These were my peeps. These strong, accomplished, kind woman are still my peeps.

We converged on hot as Hades Arizona from Milwaukee, Chicago and Minneapolis...5 of us...to be there for ACH, the glue. Miles and years have separated us, but being together quickly felt familiar. I've always thought that the mark of true friendship is being able to pick up where you left off no matter the time elapsed and also the lack of awkwardness in the silent spaces. 

Well, there was no silence. No silence at all. We reminisced and laughed and cried. We caught up and made plans for the future. We left the house we rented only to get groceries and spent time lounging in the pool with the perfect view of Camelback Mountain despite the fact that it felt more like a hot tub. We never used the hot tub btw. We cooked together and stocked ACH's freezer with soups made with love. 

During dinner Saturday night, we went around the table sharing stories of signs from the other side. We've all lost parents, and we've all had experiences. I got chills several times. It may seem like a strange conversation to be having with someone facing her own mortality, but believe me when I tell you it's not. It was comforting and affirming. Every day we live we are one day closer to death. I say that not to be morbid, but to say live. This trip was the reminder I needed to live my one wild and precious life. 

My legacy will not be in what I did or accomplished, but rather in who I was. My shining triumphs are the relationships that I forged with the people in my life. Connection is my currency. Although, I wouldn't mind getting published one day.

On Sunday night, after we said good bye to ACH and took pictures under a perfect crescent moon (a Gamma Phi symbol), we sat around the table again all feeling very low and sad. I looked at the picture I'd seen all weekend and finally realized what it was. It was depicting a light at the end of the tunnel. I had this overwhelming whole body feeling that we were only saying goodbye for now. To my core, I just knew that ACH, the strongest, smartest, funniest of friends would quiet us all again with her stories and wise words. I'll continue to pray every night, that my vision, my instinct was real.

Then...

The 80s.

Traveling was seamless, not scary.

A special birthday surprise.

Home for the weekend.

The unicorn in the pool was another sign.

Wisconsin zen.

Now. 

Light at the end of the tunnel.

ParTAY!

This time last week we were waiting for Lily to come home from lunch with friends so we could surprise her for her birthday. Mike and I decorated the house while she was out.We hosted just a small family celebration and it was just perfect. She was happily surprised, excited to have a Qdoba buffet and Baskin Robbins cake, and spoiled sweet with thoughtful bouquets and gifts. I know she felt the love. That is always what I want for my special girl.

I was so excited to give her gifts: 16...one for each year. I had too much fun picking out things I knew she would love. Little things like a personalized St Christopher key chain, a bottle of sassy blue nail polish, and a hot pink golf glove. Fun things like a succulent candle and a new bright orange Hydro flask. Thoughtful things like a book of pictures of her life, which was a fam fave, and unexpected things like a necklace in every girl's favorite little blue box. That was the last gift of 16. We got off pretty easy because she wanted a trip to Hawaii.

Qdoba is her favorite and catering is mine. I was so impressed with them. I will definitely do this again for a party. No muss, no fuss. It was affordable, easy and quite delicious.

We actually sang Happy Birthday in key before midnight. That was a first. It was one of my favorite parties ever. And although we were missing a few loved ones, it was so good to be together with those who could join us to honor this lovely young lady.

Lily's always lukewarm on big parties and being the center of attention. This year she doesn't have to worry about that, but I'm still planning a Windmill Beach day with a few of her friends before summer's end. It will be more a back to school beach day rather than a birthday beach day. I will probably get another cake though.

Here are pictures of the big day.

16 Years Sweet

Happy Birthday Cutie! It escapes me how we are already here...here almost driving, convicted with dreams and plans, full of your own thoughts and desires, so close to moving on. And yet, there's nowhere else I'd rather be than behind you, beside you cheering you on, supporting you, witnessing your growth as a young woman. The thing I admire most about you is your ability to be true to yourself and above all to know who that self is. At any age, that's a gift. At sixteen, it's serendipity. You have this uncanny way of being true to who you are while also being empathetic and considerate of the feelings of others. You stand up for your needs and beliefs while also championing others. You are slow to judge, always honest, quick to understand and always willing to forgive. Many of these qualities I sought to instill within you, but countless more are innate - the result of your own bright interior light shining through. It's a blinder. A beauty.

Don't worry...you're not perfect. Sometimes you are grumpy or short or evasive. You don't always, or often, do your chores without nagging. You refuse to wash the lone coffee cup left in the sink because it's not yours. You still struggle to wake yourself even with several alarms, If you oversleep, it's our fault. Your dad and I are often the brunt of your frustrations. You are a very sore loser especially at Wizard. You rarely make your bed or clean your frog, Bob's, cage.  For the record, I worry about him...not you.

And while you're not perfect, you are one of the best people I know and love. You are loyal and kind and all heart. 110%. Being your mom is the source of immeasurable joy in my happy life. It's the icing, the cherry, the infinite blessing. 

I love you Lily to the moon and back forever and ever.

XO,

Mom