Weekending

I woke up this morning to the sound of thunder. It was loud and it was close. There is something so soothing about the last minutes of stormy sleep. A noise, which at first I couldn't place, kept me from drifting back off...in. It was Tigger. When he's a content cat, he breathes so fast and deep that it rattles his rib cage. I guess he grooves on morning storms too, and likely was happy to have us home as well.

We took a weekend road trip to visit family in Michigan...a last hooray to summer. We like to explore the other side of the lake and catch up with my aunt and uncle at least every other year. We succeeded on both fronts.

I cannot explain how much I love road trips. There is just something about all four of us going on an adventure that makes me happy to my core.

Our first stop was for lunch and there was no question where when I saw a sign for Big Boy. Well, actually Mike saw the sign as I had my nose rather consumed in a book. I guess it's really no wonder why I love road trips.The kids were a little skeptical as they already had Steak and Shake on the brain, and they weren't sold by my description of the Swiss Miss. It was my standing order when there was a Big Boy in my neighborhood. My mom's too. The kids indulged me and we were all pleased. The burger was as good as I remembered it, and both kids raved about the chicken strips.

We arrived in Spring Lake at happy hour and that was perfect timing for reconnecting and planning for the days ahead. The guys had tee times both Friday and Saturday. The girls decided to visit some nearby dunes and shop. There was also lots of talking, some fishing, good eating and everyone was happy. Evidence forthcoming...

1. Big boys.

2. Girl on top of big dune.

3. Little Sable Lighthouse. The Michigan coast is lined with picturesque light houses.

4. We visited many cute shops in Grand Haven. This little chocolatier was also yummy.

5. Mutt and Jeff before golf.

6. Lunch one day was a delicious scoop of Michigan Cherry Ice Cream with Fudge. It was perfect.

7. Descending order.

8. Ted takes driving at the golf course to extremes.

9. Father and son.

10. Lily likes extreme driving too.

11. Lunch one day was Butch's Beach Burritos. They were delicious. My aunt and uncle also took us to their favorite pizza joint, Fricanos. We gave it the thumbs up.

12. It's rather otherworldly on the dunes.

13. At the quaint Vintage Green, Lily and I both wanted to buy the dog.

14. We took my aunt and uncle to Hearthstone one night for dinner. I got my whitefish, which is a Michigan must.

12. The Statute of Liberty in dune wood.

13. Ted and Lily even like each other on vacation.

Birthday Weekending

This past weekend is not one I’ll soon forget. It was my birthday weekend. I’m always ambivalent about my birthday until it arrives. I tell myself I don’t need or expect fanfare, but then a little thoughtful attention is always warmly received and welcome. It’s good for the heart and soul to be celebrated at least once a year. My heart and soul are happy.

Mike had a little surprise planned for me on Friday night. I’m not all that keen on surprises, but I do appreciate when my loved ones want to do something special for me so I resisted every urge to ply him with endless questions. I also pretty much decided not to sleuth on the Internet in an effort to bust his secret plan. I think my cooperation even surprised my husband.

He told me we had a 90 minute drive. I figured we’d end up at a nice restaurant maybe on a lake. When I got in the car, he had Rickie Lee Jones radio on satellite and for a good hour I took that as a clue. The Duchess of Coolsville in concert would qualify as a stellar birthday surprise. As we drove further and further into rural Wisconsin, I dashed that thought because it didn’t seem plausible.

It became clear at some point that we were headed to Green Lake, which is home to the Heidel House and several restaurants. We stopped at a local bar in town to use the facilities and have a drink. That seemed odd because we were just blocks away from the Heidel House. I decided that Green Lake is a hip little resort town and RLJ could most certainly be playing for this crowd and so I blurted it out and it was true. Of course, I got teary eyed. I had a perma-grin the rest of the night. My guy is a keeper.

She played at an opera house to a crowd of about 150. It was intimate and perfect and I loved every minute of her performance. She sang 14 songs from 5 albums by my count, 3 of them covers. While she didn’t perform my favorites, I loved her choices and the arrangement. She played one set and didn’t come out for an encore. It didn’t feel right to hoot and holler for one either as I almost felt like a lucky guest in her private company. The night was too close to make demands.

Saturday we headed up to Windmill Beach for a small gathering on the beach.We swam in the refreshing lake, sipped sangria, grilled burgers and enjoyed fireworks both in the sky and on my cupcakes! We weren’t sure we were going to spend the night, but we packed a bag just in case because I knew that we wouldn’t want to leave. We didn’t. We stayed all day Sunday despite the fact that I was planning on attending mass at Irish Fest Sunday morning...a mass I look forward to all year. I was up at 7 o’clock, but not feeling compelled to leave the peace and solitude for noise and crowds. I am not regretting my decision. We came home Sunday night sandy, spent and soul-sated.

I was kind of stoked that the solar eclipse was happening on my birthday, but we didn’t have glasses and I’m not all too sure that I would have stared at the sun even with them. It still didn’t seem all that smart to me, but it was exciting. The Leo that I am was convinced that all the hoopla was in my honor, or at the very least the fact that this rare occurrence coincided with my birthday was some sort of statement about me...special.

My little family of four celebrated with presents and dinner out Monday night. The truth is that I didn’t need any more revery, but I didn’t feel like cooking. And I always need the cards the kids make because they make the day. Teddy hailed me for being his life enthusiast and Lily called me out as the best listener and cook. They picked out lovely things from Aveda and Sur La Table, two of my favorite stores. I felt spoiled and loved. I picked Pizza Man only because I wanted their escargot. They make it best, and the Malbec I ordered perfectly paired with the snails. Lily enjoyed her fettuccine alfredo and the boys their pizzas. Ted ordered and finished a pie topped with lamb sausage and aged cheddar. Dare I say my boy is becoming a foodie. We all enjoyed the rooftop deck on the perfect night. We took the long way home at Ted’s request singing Jack Johnson all along the lakefront. I was feeling so full as in my heart was bursting with the love I have for my three, and the love they have for me. I'm ready for another year.

Grateful Friday

Today I give thanks for...

A surprise date with my guy tonight. I don't have any clue what we are doing and I'm not big on surprises, but I'm trying to go with it because he knows me and he knows that.

Ice gels, Advil and ankle braces. Also my family, especially Mike, for picking up so much slack as I recover.

I am recovering slowly, but surely and this little lover has been my snuggle buddy.

Recovery for Grandma and Sabrina who had surgeries in the last couple weeks.

Warm peach crisp with homemade vanilla bean ice cream. I only had a bite, but that's all I needed.

Sauteed broccolini.

A new bread bowl from Candace for my birthday. It was such a thoughtful gift, and yes I used it right away.

A fun and delicious night enjoying friends, their beautiful outdoor living space and grilled lobster tails.

Roses for Rosie. This pitcher that I took from my Grandma's last week. I hadn't noticed it in all the times I'd been there. Inside she had a note that read: Collectible worth money. I don't think it's anything special, but she did and so I felt that we shouldn't donate it. It's the perfect vase for a dozen roses, and I'll think of Grandma Rose when I use it.

Peanut wants to come to the Big Apple with us. We got our tickets and we're making our lists. I don't think we're going to have time to sleep.

Teddy's been picking up his guitar again. He is musically inclined. He just has to practice.

Windmill Beach tomorrow.

Hump Day

I woke up this morning with the sense that I had overslept. It was 7:30 and it took me a moment to realize I didn't need to be anywhere today. Before I drifted back off, it occurred to me that Teddy did and the house was quiet as sleep. He had cross country at 8 o'clock so I rose and went down the hall to his room sans pain and with minimal hobbling.

In my dream before waking, I realized that my ankle was not just sprained, but that my foot was almost parallel to my leg. Actually, it was a bit of a nightmare. Now I have that relieved and grateful feeling that I am healing even as I acknowledge I won't be running any time soon. I also won't be Lake Michigan swimming in the middle of the night.

I don't know how he goes from sound sleep one minute to speed distance running the next. No coffee, no carbs, no pain or discomfort. There's so much grace I would like to give my younger body. I didn't appreciate it as deserved.

Nothing makes me appreciate it more now than a life of RICE. There are only so many hours one can stay prone and idle. I've been tested and tried to take it easy, ask for help and watch too much trash television. I've actually learned some valuable lessons though. Yes, even from the trash t.v.

One lesson I am forever trying to put into practice is gratitude even as I know a thankful heart is the gift that keeps giving. At times, appreciation comes easily and then before long it becomes a struggle again to hail blessings both big and small. 

Today I'm feeling abundance without even trying. That's the best kind of day. I have bread proofing in the oven and plans to do whatever my heart and soul desires today.

The list likely includes more cooking, and some reading and writing all with loving intention and attention. This is a be.here.now kind of day and I intend to savor all the minutes. 

The Story of a Settee

Once there was a girl named Kristin who was moving into her first apartment on raucous Langdon Street. It was right across the house from the Alpha Chi Omega house, which was the house she really wanted to pledge as a freshman and which she likely would have deactivated from just as she did the Gamma Phi Betas at the end of her junior year. I think maybe sorority life was just not for her. She made some great friends there though, but she was planning to move in with her best friend Sarah who she had known since kindergarten in Miss Sweet's class.

Living together didn't exactly work out, but when Sarah was home from communing with the Rainbow Gathering, they still spent time together often in the living room at 131 Langdon Street. This settee was a prominent piece in the big, airy room. It came from Kristin's Grandma Rose and joined Sarah's plush orange two-seater, 70s number that she left despite the fact she never stayed. It was quaint. It was eclectic. It was lonely.

Change was looming, decisions were mounting and while it was exciting, it was also a time of trial. Come spring, Kristin graduated and left Madison with her settee. Sarah stayed to finish her degree. She'd lost academic time traveling with the Dead Heads. They lost touch.

It wasn't the first time and it wouldn't be the last. The friends spent most of elementary school astray only to reconnect in high school. They would cross paths again when Sarah was pregnant with her twin girls and settling down. Then again when they celebrated their 10 year SHS reunion. After Kristin's mom passed. There were always a flurry of confessions, amends, and  promises. There was also a sad acceptance that they had neglected a special bond. Over the years, it became clear that they were powerfully connected in ways that transcended the explainable: reaching out or plain running into one another at uncanny times.

So 43 years after Kristin and Sarah first met, and 27 years after 131 Langdon, Kristin snaps a picture of the settee at her Grandma Rose's estate sale and she forwards it to Sarah. Sarah recognizes it and also the significance of receiving it on a day filled with packing up her girls for a fast approaching move to college. They both know it to be a universe moment, and they're both listening because they don't believe in coincidence or happenstance.

13

THIRTEEN IS…

Long legs (5' 4" tall) and big dreams. 

You no longer want to be a dolphin trainer or a vet. These days you talk about a career in business and you have goals to become a CEO. If you could have anything you want for this birthday, it'd be a dog. Or two.

We're in negotiations right now. I'm thinking maybe you should be a lawyer. You are still sweet and sometimes sulky...rarely sassy often silly.

You are equal parts girly girl and tom boy.

Some of your favorites:

Class English

Flavor Mint Chip (We still have to make this one.)

Book The Hunger Games (This has not been a literary summer much to my dismay.)

Sport Softball (Fall ball starts soon.)

Stroke Freestyle

Pro Team The Milwaukee Brewers (We enjoyed a game last month.)

Restaurant Qdoba (You ate it last night.)

Pizza Pepperoni and onion

Season A tie between summer and fall

Animal The giraffe, but you have a soft spot for all animals especially Peanut who is your baby.

Car Jeep

Color Mint green (like your room.)

Candy Bar Twix

Musical Phantom of the Opera for the music (but you're excited to see Cats in October.)

Beach Windmill Beach

Store The Gap

#  12 (But you're #6 on the Lady Knights.)

Dog Husky

Game Apple to Apples or Minecraft

Snack Guacamole (Goldfish, chips and salsa and watermelon are close runners up.)

Holiday Christmas

Soda  Diet Mountain Dew (But you almost always opt for water.)

Place to Visit NYC (in October!) or Europe (someday)

Plant  Succulents (You are in a serious cactus craze.)

Music Pop music, but no artists in particular

I am so proud of the young lady you are. You are kind, compassionate and caring. Your heart is gold. I love the way you are always thinking of others, but it's important that you think of yourself too. It's OK to put yourself first at times. We've been working together on that and I think this is going to be an exciting year for you. I love you to the moon and back forever and ever.

xo,

Mom

Windmill Beach Birthday Weekending

All we have is now. We had what was. We might have something more, but there’s no warrant for the future.

With that in mind, I’ve been absent because I’ve been present. 

There was a time I would have said busy. There was also a time I would have made myself busier by forcing myself to come here even if time didn’t allow. There was another time when I would have left the now for the then. Left as in disengaged from. Now as in contemporaneous. Then as in previous. Yep, I would have ceased making memories simply to record them so terrified that they might slip from my mind before they were captured, excavated, curated.

But one of the things I’ve learned as I embrace this middle place in my life is that the joy moments and bright spots don’t fade or fizzle no matter how they are or are not commemorated. They remain. They sustain. They continue to shine.

I’ve also learned: it’s a waste of time to spit shine my house every week, I cannot shop without lists, I don’t go anywhere without my cheaters, it’s important to celebrate everything and say I love you as often as you say goodbye or good night, naps are essential, Alexa may be spying on me and I’m OK with that, I should always let my husband pick the movie and probably what I order at the restaurant, everyone is going through something so kindness matters and forgiveness rules sublime, apologies are almost always welcome and accepted, and it’s impossible to take too many pictures.

The pictures take me right back in time and I feel all the feels present when they were taken. They are samskaras manifested. Prints that imprint upon my heart and soul.

We took a great many photographs last weekend. Family gathered from here and there, and far and away to celebrate birthdays, summer and the simple blessings of being together.

Here is the evidence…

The gracious host and hostess photo bombed by the guest of honor.

The quaint scene.

The picturesque front yard.

Cousins arrived from NYC and Denver very late Thursday night. We stayed up until very early Friday morning catching up. It's always the drill and we know it. We made our way north to Windmill Beach Friday evening and the comfortably chilly Lake Michigan water was just what we needed. The broody late day sky was the perfect back drop for cocktails and selfies on the beach. The wavy water made kayaking a little challenging and boogie boarding possible.

After evening fall, which is what my brother prefers to call the gloaming, we ordered pizza, celebrated Knox's 17th birthday and played Shut Box. As you can see...we didn't have any fun at all and we stayed up until the wee hours again. In fact, some of us went swimming under the stars and one of us sprained an ankle by stepping in a hole on the dark beach.

Saturday we celebrated Lily's thirteenth birthday at Windmill Beach, one of her favorite places. It was a beautiful day of favorites: people, food and pastimes.  My brother and sister-in-law made the day special in every way and I know my girl felt how lucky and loved she is. 

 Lemon cake with raspberry mousse and vanilla buttercream at the birthday girl's request. It was almost too pretty to eat.

 Happy Birthday Lily Kathleen.

Happy Brad.

Of course, a rainbow showed up in the sky.

It was a great beach day. Despite the fact that it was a little overcast, the air was temperate and the water warm. Lily is happiest when she's in the water so she was in her element. We served many of her favorite foods: Grandpa's guacamole, my homemade salsa and Dad's bbq wings for appetizers, and a taco bar with all the the fixings for dinner.

After dinner, we played 13 Questions: How Well Do You Know Lily. It was good silly fun and she felt special being the center of the attention. She was sufficiently spoiled sweet, and got most everything on her birthday list including a trip to NYC in October, which was not something she asked for or expected.

Sadly Sunday we cleaned up, packed up and headed home. 

It was hard to leave this scene and also hard to say goodbye to TJ and Knox who were Denver-bound that afternoon.

Monday was Lily's official birthday. She, Sabrina and I painted pottery and went out for a celebratory lunch. Then I took Sabrina to the airport and I came home and crashed.

I think thirteen is going to be hard to top, but without a doubt...we'll try.